17 Years Ago I Left Home

So this trip has been quite emotional…

Coming back to my hometown after almost 2 years of not being able to visit

Spending hours chatting to my mum and nephew (while Cliff was having some quality quiet time in the background, probably investing in crypto and checking out apartments for us to rent for next summer – maybe )

Then realising that last week it has actually been 17 years since I left home for a year

Got on a 26hr bus ride to London with 2 bags and £300 in my pocket

With a conversion rate between PLN to GBP being 7:1 you can tell it wasn’t much

No job and no place to live…

Just an awareness that I needed to give (A LOT for me then) money back to a good friend that I spent on a travel rep course in Egypt earlier that year that was meant to get me a summer job to pay it back and earn me enough to get me started after I graduated that summer

Well… as you know that didn’t happen, the travel agent went bust and there I was – no job, no money and no idea

There’s so much bubbling up for me after this trip

When I asked Cliff in a conversation over dinner tonight, what it was that he witnessed go on for me over the last few days (he’s an amazing observer and space holder I tell ya!), he said:

compassion

peace

forgiveness

acceptance

patience

And for a (VERY) long time in my life I believed none of those were possible.

And as you likely know, I am a relentless explorer of consciousness and awareness

A propagator of radical responsibility taking

And following that with inspired action that allows you to get a different result to what you’re currently experiencing

And you also very likely know that my life right now is what as a little girl I could have never even imagined

And yet still, apart from the personal growth, physical and emotional health and any other aspect of expanding and exploring yourself that you can think of

The amount of healing towards my family, my story and history that I’m now realising happened in the last few days with no conscious intention to do so

Is something that I wish for every single one of you to experience!!

And remember that the more you’re thinking you’re ‘trying’ to do or work on something, the more likely you’re going to push against resistance

And the more you detach yourself from expectation of any outcome and just allow for life to guide you and just BE

The more magic unravels

And the more life ‘surprises’ you in the most amazing ways!

And when Cliff and I concluded our conversation about it about it last week he dropped another wisdom bomb on me (I needed that)

‘So remember now, that if at any point in your life for whatever reason you believe change is not possible – remember this weekend!’

I actually have tears in my eyes writing this, and if you’ve read up until this point

Thank you!